Does Negativity Drive You Mad?

Are some of your team consistently negative? It’s great to disagree with each other and healthy to have different points of views. I’m talking about the kind of behaviours that kill the energy in the team.

I’ve seen this from both points of view in my Time To Think™ coaching. From the people who are perceived to be negative (often wrongly) and from the leaders trying to engage and re-inspire a team. If this is something you’d like to tackle, do get in touch. There’s a great deal you can do to turn this around working 1-2-1 or we can create a bespoke group course.

7 TOP TIPS

  1. Be patient
  2. Show empathy and respect for the person and their point of view
  3. Remember you’re all ‘One Tribe’ – assume good intent and value
  4. Consider that they may not be negative, you are just not listening or you simply have a clash of communication styles
  5. Gently help them reframe and explore a different point of view
  6. Talk about impact of their behaviour on others – the phrase ‘when you do x, it can be perceived as…’ reduces defensiveness
  7. Give attention and reward the positive behaviours you want to see more of

KineticFuture can coach you to be a world-class communicator and leader. Coaching 1-2-1 and in groups. Clients include Abbvie, Amgen, Gilead, GSK, Novartis, Mars, Pladis, WPP and Barclays. We have six main areas of work: Time to Think™ coachingexecutive presencepresenting and storytellingtricky conversationsresilience and communicating purpose.

Contact us today to book a course or to find out more.

Are You Living Someone Else’s Values?

Are you crystal clear on your own personal values? Or are you relying on words that resemble something you’ve been told to be? Can you name just two values which are at your core? And can you say, hand on heart, that you really live them? This knowledge gives you the resilience, integrity and purpose you need to lead.

Here, I’ve given you some quick tips on how to get going on this. And, if you’d like personal coaching to think about your values, vision or personal brand do drop me a line and we can talk about it. The Time To Think™ coaching approach I use is very different and highly energising.

Quick Tips To Start

Some of the best practical worksheets on values are in Brené Brown’s Dare To Lead book – pages 190-197. So do buy the book. In the meantime, here are a few of her suggestions.

  • Find a long list of values on-line (e.g. legacy, fairness, curiosity). These values will be the same for work or home if they are to be powerful. Sit down quietly. Take your time to really think about each one. Now whittle them down to two values. Others will be important but these two will be your ‘red line’ areas that you will not compromise on and drive the others. Be prepared to feel uncomfortable prioritising these over others.
  • Take each value – write down:
  1. What are three behaviours that support your value?
  2. What are three slippery behaviours that are outside your value?
  3. What’s an example of a time when you were fully living into this value?

Enjoy!

KineticFuture can coach you to be a world-class communicator and leader. Coaching 1-2-1 and in groups. Clients include Abbvie, Amgen, Gilead, GSK, Novartis, Mars, Pladis, WPP and Barclays. We have six main areas of work: Time to Think™ coachingexecutive presencepresenting and storytellingtricky conversationsresilience and communicating purpose.

Contact us today to book a course or to find out more.

I Think Too Much

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Do you lie awake at three in the morning with annoying work thoughts whizzing around your head?

Ironically, the solution could be making more time to think productively during the day. Call us if you’d like to be coached in a Thinking Environment. You’ll find it exciting, transformative and that it delivers results quickly.

Simple Top Tip For Today

I found an old notebook yesterday which listed my own big work dilemmas that were whizzing around my head at the time. I was amazed to realise that they didn’t bother me now. This was a direct result of being coached myself in a Thinking Environment. But here’s a simple tip to access your best thinking right now working with a trusted colleague.

-Sit down with someone you trust in private, in a place which communicates you are valuable. Set aside 20 minutes.

-Agree with your partner who is the ‘thinking partner’ and who is the ‘coach’.

-Agree that the ‘coach’ will never ever interrupt or suggest solutions and will listen intently with warmth, ease, encouragement, non-judgement, genuine curiosity and 100% confidentiality (no compromises!) This is the thinking environment.

  • Get comfortable
  • The ‘coach’ asks, “what would you like to think about and what are your thoughts?”
  • The thinker thinks, pauses, thinks, speaks or doesn’t speak. They are thinking. The ‘coach’ has the privilege of seeing the agility of the brain at work.
  • The ‘coach’ maintains the thinking environment.
  • When they’ve finished thinking, the ‘thinker’ writes down any notes and you appreciate each other.

See what happens! It could be the best thinking you have done in a very long time.

If you would like to be coached by us in a Thinking Environment we’d love to talk.

KineticFuture can coach you to be a world-class leader and communicator. Coaching 1-2-1 and in groups. Clients include Abbvie, Amgen, Gilead, GSK, Novartis, Mars, Pladis, WPP and Barclays. We have six main areas of work: Time to think coachingexecutive presencepresenting and storytellingtricky conversationsresilience and communicating purpose.

Do You Care Too Much?

You’re committed. You’re great at your job. You want to get ahead. Great!

But are you the one who always works the longest hours and has the most projects to manage with the least resources? Do you take responsibility or blame when it really should be shared?

You may be proud that you can make it all happen. But this pattern may be damaging your career.

It’s something that many people bring to our The Time To Think™ coaching sessions. Just having the space to think about what’s going on versus what you want can produce transformative change. Sometimes we’ll work on skills too. The choice is yours.

Use the arrival of spring to make some important changes. Contact us if you’d like to discuss your coaching.

Top Tips If You Care Too Much

Have a think about some of these questions.

  1. Do I feel I have to take on all this responsibility? Do I think this is true? What are my reasons for thinking so? Or is it fake news?
  2. Do I notice myself doing this a lot – at work and home? What assumptions am I making?
  3. How do successful people I admire manage their lives? What boundaries and roles do they define?
  4. Does my behaviour point to me being a doer rather than a strategic leader?
  5. What if I just didn’t do it this way? What would I gain? What would it free me up to do? What if there were no rules or expectations? What would I do?
  6. What is my purpose, what really makes my spirits fly?

KineticFuture can coach you to be a world-class leader and communicator. Coaching 1-2-1 and in groups. Clients include Abbvie, Amgen, Gilead, GSK, Novartis, Mars, Pladis, WPP and Barclays. We have six main areas of work: The Time To Think™ coaching, executive presence, presenting and storytelling, tricky conversations, resilience and communicating purpose.

Empathy Key to Co-Creation

The three types of empathy are a hot topic in our age of co-creation. If your leaders, MSLs, marketeers or technical teams would like coaching in this area, do call us. It’s a fascinating subject.

Empathy researchers define empathy as:

‘The ability to sense others’ emotions coupled with the ability to imagine what someone else might be thinking or feeling’.

There is real depth in this area which can help you hone or even manage your empathy. You may be using too little or too much.

For certain, developing your E-awareness can help you with: matrix working, co-creation with the NHS or other groups, managing upwards or coping better with upsetting work situations.

Top Tip for Empathy

Listen to Understand

  • Genuinely be interested, want to understand their views.
  • Don’t ever interrupt the other person or just be waiting until you can dive in with your own point. Let them finish fully.
  • Show it by keeping your eyes on their eyes, using open and forward body language and exude ease not rush or competition.

KineticFuture specialises in leadership and communications coaching. Karen Moyse has been a coach for 8 years and a skills trainer for 20. She recently graduated as a TIME TO THINK coach specialising in the thinking environment. KineticFuture courses include Executive Presence, Presentations and Time to think coaching for individuals and teams.

Do contact us if you’d like to talk about your own goals right now on karen@kineticfuture.com