Get Over Yourself #1

I gave a ‘Ted Talk’ last week to a big food company. They were wonderful but I was nervous – because my son was going to be in the audience. Crazy I know!

Here are 3 self coaching questions which got me back on track – suggested by Andy McNab, ex SAS.

  1. What would I do if I didn’t feel this way?
  2. What would I do if I didn’t give a damn what other people thought?
  3. What would I do if it just didn’t matter?

Then just do it. Works a treat! The presentation was really enjoyable.

To boost your confidence and get out of your own way, call us. We can coach you and your team to deal with the tough parts of all communications in business. You’ll work on 3 things: mind-set, communications strategy and physicality.

Have a look at the book ‘The Good Psychopath’s Guide to Success’ for more gems.

What Should I do with My Hands?

Remember the Faulty Towers sketch “Don’t Mention the War”. Well that’s how I feel about even mentioning the words hands and presentations in the same sentence. The more you think about them the worse it can get. But it is a question that comes up in 95% of our training sessions.

So, if you are feeling very self conscious about your hands when you present, there are some techniques which will help you look confident and open.

  • Do what comes naturally to you when you’re at your relaxed best. Presentations are just a conversation.
  • Remember it is all about generosity – sharing your enthusiasm and energy with the audience.
  • Ignore people who talk about ‘windmill arms’. We rarely see anyone who gesticulates too much.
  • Use your hands to match the story you are telling and to make it really interesting. Start to be aware of how you naturally do this when you are talking with friends.
  • If you feel uncomfortable, just concentrate on keeping your hands up in front of you and open. Even if you make small gestures it will be better than locking your arms by your sides or closing your arms across your body.
  • Find a holding position for when you start or are waiting for questions. Place your hands with a few fingers lightly touching together in front of your tummy button – this works as long as they are not tense. Hands dropped by your side are good or even put your hands behind your back if you are desperate.  Just stay open and relaxed.

Our presentation courses are evidence based and 80% physical practice. We blend brain science, positive psychology and advanced communications skills to help leaders become exceptional communicators.  You can work with us one to one or in groups.
Call us today to find out how we can help your leaders become exceptional communicators.

What Gives You Away?

Remember the baddie in Casino Royale playing poker with James Bond? Bond thought that his blood tears were his ‘tell’ – the giveaway sign that he had a bad hand and was uncomfortable.

When you present, it’s valuable to know what you do when you are uncomfortable. We call this ‘managing your tell’.

Some people smile too much, others close up their body language or step backwards, a few get aggressive. What’s your own tell?  We all do something different and weird.

Humans are excellent at knowing when something isn’t quite right and can interpret your ‘tell’ as insecurity, lack of conviction or simply that they’ve hit a raw nerve in the negotiations.

When we coach groups, we help you find your own ‘tell’ by simulating your personal high pressure situation. You’ll be surprised by what you find.  You describe your own scenario, walk through the door into the meeting, start to speak and take tough questions from colleagues.  I can guarantee your ‘tell’ will emerge in just two minutes.

Once you have this valuable knowledge you can manage it and stay relaxed under pressure.

You can try this yourself but do practice with colleagues you know and trust and don’t get too personal!

Come on one of our Presence courses to learn to ‘manage your tell’ and maintain your presence and authority during Q&A, meetings and presentations. We’d love to hear from you. Contact us to find out more.

Personal Presence Post Brexit

Your personal presence in a meeting can have a big impact.  Post Brexit it’s even more important that you know how to use your presence to influence the meeting and be the person others can respect and trust.

Emotions in business meetings are running high and the issues under discussion really matter to people.  Views are strong and not everyone is listening or thinking logically.

As a leader or as a consultant to the business you can be the person who makes a real difference to the outcome.  You can use your personal presence to underpin your counsel and create a more productive atmosphere in the room.

The first step is to assess your own personal presence.  Have a think about these self diagnosis questions and rate the elements on a scale of 1-10.  How people react to you and how other people change their own behaviour as a result will give you the best insight.

  1. Do people notice your arrival?
  2. Do they listen when you speak?
  3. Do they ask questions of you and others?
  4. Are you constantly interrupted?
  5. What is the ratio of positive to negative comments in the room?
  6. Do the more reflective people start to contribute?
  7. Does the meeting start to become more relaxed, collaborative and productive?
  8. Do individuals seek you out for further conversations later?

You can create a more powerful personal presence.  Kineticfuture coaches you to do this and shows you how to apply the skills to real situations you are dealing with.  You can attend a group course or work one to one.  You learn to amplify your own strengths, use your physicality, create a more confident mindset, learn good skills to listen as well as influence others with your point of view.  Do call or contact us to find out more.