Soft Eyes. Manage Your Tell 3

Your eyes really  are the gateway to your soul.  And it’s one of the first things to go when we’re under pressure. Here’s a top tip that will give you the warm authority leaders need even when the going gets tough. Click here to watch.

I hope it’s useful.  Let us know how you get on.  If you’d like us to coach you or your team to increase your presence, gravitas or warm authority do give us a ring.  It would be a pleasure to work with you on this.

EP & Gravitas Part 6 – The Real Secret of Gravitas

How many people do you know who have this gravitas thing? I bet it’s a short list. Michelle Obama will be up there.

Now ask who makes you personally feel respected, liberated and able to really think at your best. It’ll be a different list but I bet Michelle will still be on it.

The real secret of gravitas is how you make others feel, how you can liberate and ignite their own potential.

These are the people we will walk through walls for. These are the people we would like to elect.

The real secret to gravitas or executive presence is about ease. It is about being able to be genuinely interested in what others have to say because you are not worried about yourself.

It’s about allowing others’ great thinking and potential to flourish because you personally don’t have to control, to be certain, to impress or rush.

Yes, you do need to really know your stuff 6 questions deep and people need to know you are resilient under fire.

Yes, you do need to own and communicate your own point of view in a compelling way.

Yes, you do need to learn to adapt your style to connect with different people and cultures. You do need to make good decisions and execute well.

But the real gravitas, the real secret that makes this possible? That’s about being able to ignite others to fly.

You can absolutely be this person with just a little work.

Whether you are an introvert, an extravert, a young leader or an established leader adapting to a new role.

That’s what we coach at KineticFuture.

We’re often asked why do you blend psychology with the physicality of theatre skills? Why is this resilience and positive leadership malarkey relevant? And what’s with this neuroscience bit and obsession about your planning tools for a communications strategy?

Because these are the skills you need to be genuinely, deep down, long term successful when you are battling real life. And these are the keys to open up yourself to new and exciting personal possibilities.

If you’d like to find out how you or your colleagues could be coached on HOW you can learn to do this, email us a quick “yes please”. And we’ll get in touch for a chat.

EP & Gravitas Part 3 – Double Standards For Women

Double Standards For Women

Q: If a man is assertive and speaks out strongly that seems ok. But if I do the same as a female leader I’m considered aggressive or even emotional. How do I deal with these double standards and have executive presence?

A: Infuriating isn’t it! The EP strategies below have been useful for other senior women and you could add them in to what’s working for you already.

Exercises:

  1. Be clear why you got the job. Yes you need to flex and grow in a new role but don’t squash the assets that made you successful in the first place. Do you know what they are? Are you clear about your own brand, vision and values? Don’t get lost. Don’t make the mistake of needing to be liked. There are huge advantages of being a senior woman at work. What can you do to achieve results in your own way?
  2. Can you make an asset of being different? At first, you can go in with a disruption strategy, but normally it’s easier to connect to ‘The Tribe’ by fitting in and biding your time a little to win their confidence and work out the lie of the land. Then, you can dial up the assets that make you different and useful to the business. That might be your culture, your style or different knowledge and perspective.
  3. Calibrate your reactions. The harsh reality is that in traditional work cultures senior women need to be calmer and more measured in their delivery than men. Do you think you need to dial down your behaviour, choose your moments or just ignore the feedback? Check you have a strong positive physicality. It communicates gravitas and executive presence fast. In particular, work on a lower, more resonant voice – high pitched, light voices can sound like whining and many older men can’t even hear voices on a high frequency. Of course, using wry humour can be a more effective way to diffuse a situation or make your point. Could you mix more of this in?
  4. Come to the forefront on the tough issues. You can score big on executive presence if you communicate strongly when there’s a big issue that the team are finding difficult to solve. Choose your moment and issue, have all your facts and figures in place to make the case strongly. Be savvy with socialising your recommendation ahead of the big meeting or presentation. And follow up with key players.

To be coached on the HOW of developing your executive presence and gravitas for your own situation do give us a ring. We develop bespoke courses for individuals or groups of all sexes, ages and cultures.

EP & Gravitas Part 2 – Get in the Game for Gravitas

Confidence and grace under fire is one of the top aspects of gravitas, according to research from The Talent Foundation. Today’s question in this series is about being heard.  Timing is everything.  If you can make a well researched point strongly, particularly in the tough times, you will boost your gravitas and executive presence.

Get in the Game for Gravitas

Q: I get the feeling that other senior leaders are not really listening to what I say when we’re round the table. Yet someone else will make the same point and it’s accepted.  Infuriating.  It’s worse when I’m with very loud people.  How do I change this dynamic?

A: This is about developing your professional presence. It’s hard to know exactly what’s happening here without seeing you in action.  But there are three easy things you can try out now and see what works for you.  It’s good practice for when you really need to make a key point in the tough times.  Do the homework below, practice out loud for 15 minutes and then use one or two of the approaches in an easy meeting and see what happens.

Exercises:

    1. Work out a clear point of view and call to action that you can deliver succinctly and with conviction. Then practice. If you ramble, repeat yourself or use words like maybe or perhaps you are undermining yourself. A point of view is a 30 second nugget of good thinking that supports the objective. The call to action is your 15 second advice on what should happen next. It’s the point you would make if you only had 45 seconds. It’s useful to start by saying “To be successful… or To achieve x we need to ….”
    2. Get in the game. This means that before you even speak people need to be aware of your presence. Walk in tall, sit up, lean forward to listen to someone else talking, ask a question, look involved, interested and relaxed. Sit in a power position in the room – in easy line of sight of the key players and avoid being hidden.
    3. Use an easy vocal strength tip. Before you speak, take an intake of breath or use the current speaker’s name to signal you are about to make a point. Then emphasise the consonant at the beginning of the first word of your sentence and the first word e.g. the W in what. Then decide which are the ‘money words’ in your point – essentially the key words you need to emphasise in the sentence. Underline them in rehearsal. This will slow down your delivery and make it more impactful.

To be coached to develop your executive presence and gravitas for your current situation do give us a ring. We develop bespoke courses for individuals or groups. Find out more here.

 

Gravitas For The Real World

As the planning season is about to go full throttle, we’re going to focus the next few inspirations on the HOW of gravitas and executive presence.

Looking at real challenges for the real world.

Could you let us have your questions and views on this subject? No names will be attributed unless you’d like us to! We’ll make sure we answer them.

For example, the questions we often receive on our courses are:

  • How do you convey your competence and be heard?
  • How do you get the balance between authenticity and fitting in?
  • How do you encourage and mentor diversity?
  • How best to handle traditional male cultures if you are a woman?

We look forward to hearing from you.

If you would like to know how developing gravitas helps you to ignite people around your own purpose we can help. We coach leadership teams to be exceptional communicators.

Contact us to find out more about our bespoke inspirational courses.